Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Lady Cop Week: Day Three

Fresh from her defeat of The Incredible Hulk through the use of a hat, Liza Warner: Lady Cop is ready for some luvvin'...

Take a look at the male cop's right hand. It appears he's just broken up an illegal vibrator counterfeiting ring. On second thought, maybe he's just holding a vibrator.

"I can't marry a working man..." Turn over and lay face first, man. There's a "surprise" in every box.

"HAL?" As in Hal JORDAN? Oh, HO! This is just too good! This thing's gonna write itself from here on out! What is it with guy's named HAL? Are they all pre-destined for idiocy? The naming of your child Hal, not only pre-destines your child towards a life full of massive head trauma, it also denies him the ability to lay his head in a girl's lap without realizing there's no penis in it.

He wants a stay-at-home beard, she thinks about death 24/7. I cannot wait to see the baby pictures.

Lady Cop, you don't go looking for VD, it finds you. Just ask our girl in orange.

Lady Cop!!!! Quick!!! Get to her vagina before it explodes!!!

Lady Cop can even help "arrest" VD. Is there anything she can't do?!?

All I wanna know is how does Lady Cop know so damned much about VD? VD must be like her hobby or sumthin'...

Again, I don't mean to cast aspersions but do you think that maybe her father having his little teen hip-hugger wearing daughter wait around for him down by the docks could have something to do with her contracting VD? God knows, a dockworker would never, ever take advantage of a young girl's trust.

Nope.

Never.

Plus, it's a well known fact that men don't get VD.

My uncle, the dockworker told me so.

Tune in tomorrow as Lady Cop Week continues when G.I. Joe's Snake-Eyes joins us to teach us that knowing about VD is "half the battle."

8 comments:

Sleestak said...

Lady Cop is one of those great, unfinished storylines that comics produce every now and then. Here's hoping Batman will get involved, cuz she's just a girl and catching murderers is a man's job.

Scipio said...

An astonishingly rich story.

Yeah, that outfit pretty much screams, "Get ya hot fresh VD right here!"

The thing I like most about Lady Cop is that speaks almost entirely in cliche and metaphor. A half expect her to pop out with "Darmok & Jhilad at Tinagra!"

David said...

Bwaaaaa!

naladahc said...

VD: When the (vagina) walls fell.

Derek B. Haas said...

Scipio, holy shit, you win for that reference.

Ragnell said...

I need to find this comic.

Brandon said...

I'd like to see Liza Warner vs. Renee Montoya and Maggie Sawyer in some kind of Lady Cop Olympics.

Ragnell said...

Don't forget Hope O'Dare.

Go blondes (Maggie and Liza) vs Non-Blondes (Hope and Renee).